Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Thoughts on the Middle School Misses and Protecting My Equipment

Here .... I am free to be me....  I grabbed my gear ,   May 20th, 2017 and kicked my shoes off in the growing pile of foot coverings at the end of the planks.   I was ready to go , ready to capture this wedding .... but afraid because of the raindrops and the wind that had shown itself up to the very minutes we walked out on the beach.    I wasn't afraid for me.  I was afraid of the damage control that I would have to implement to protect my equipment, my "babies"  (cameras and lenses) from the elements ... at the perspective cost to my clients that were getting married,  "RIGHT HERE ,  RIGHT NOW!"  I stayed fast, holding on to my equipment, whispering a quiet prayer of protection and then smiling and looking my "groom" in the eye and stating "its a sign of good fortune" when it rains on your wedding day.  He replied,  "thats what I am learning!" 

Learning.  I learned quite a bit this month.  Some of it good... some of it not so good.   All of my learning affects my job,  my photography ,  and who I am  and "who I am" affects my creativity and my learning.   All of my learning affects my future learning.  All of my learning..... is never ending.. its what I do best... study, analyze and learn constantly.   I think that when I stop learning is when I will stop living.  

One of the things that I have learned over the past several years came as quite a "shock" to my system.   I was always warned about the Mid Life Crisis that men sometimes experience but no one said a word about the Middle School Misses that comes about the same time frame for women.  It appears that a lot of the characteristics I despised in my middle school counterparts have reappeared at this point in my life.   

I wonder a lot about this and question if this is a geographical phenomena or a local one.  I wonder why everyone talks about the "male" experience as if nothing but love is going on with the women?   I wonder if I notice this because of the large amount of people I have come in contact with or because I attract a certain "type" of person.   I don't know about others but in my humble opinion that mid life crisis stuff is much more appealing to me than the middle school misses that happens to the ladies.    The men are making themselves more appealing and reclaiming their youth in many ways while the women are reclaiming all of the things that I struggled to "grow away from."  

I think the answer lies in the FACEBOOK / SOCIAL MEDIA phenomena or the public soap operas of our generation. I think the reason I wasn't warned of this new life cycle development is that it is BRAND NEW or the publicity of such is !  

I see women laughing at the expense of others in little bitty groups of click-ish followings.  I see other grown women showing or talking about what they are wearing under their clothes or not.   I see a bunch of woman agreeing to the most ridiculous of posts by the very men going through their own crises's .... I see passive aggressive and cryptic posts on social media like its some type of diary or tool to communicate your inner most feelings to get attention from those that would not give you the time of day in normal life.   I see the middle school misses.... fighting over the attention in most often than not "negative ways."   

All of this happening really saddens me.   

I am thinking of leaving my photo page and my frugal page up on facebook for obvious reasons and deleting my personal page.  The strife and negativity that is being thrown around is much more than my empathic self can handle.   The Facebook world that some  are still enjoying the political sabotages and the personal situations that I never intended to read or let into my sphere of being.  

I have reduced my Friends list from 4000 to just over 2700 .  It has taken me many hours to do.  I have stopped looking in my newsfeed and asked that my friends and family tag me in anything they didn't want me to miss.    I have purposely gone to my kids pages and a handful of people that I do life with to check and see how they are doing .   I have purposely turned into myself to avoid the dramatics , the antics and the messages of those that find pleasure in other peoples pain. 

A friend of mine has shown me the way.  She is teaching me that disengaging from this venue of entertainment is the way to go.  She has opened my eyes to the people that choose to learn and communicate through this medium and how most often than not, the middle school misses are not learning, or working , or participating in the real world but merely starting fire after fire for people like me to get burned by.   I am busy protecting my equipment , kicking my shoes off , trying to dodge the harsh winds of movement and the storms that are all in my newsfeed.  

It appears (on social media) that those with the most drama, the most mishaps, the most problems are the ones that have the most "traffic" and those that are living simply falls to the wayside as boring or uninteresting at best.  I am finding that much more appealing at this point in my life.  I am much more interested in your food menu or photos of your travels than your gossip .

I especially find it interesting and amusing that people wish for "karma to kick in" or for Karma to hurry up.... I laugh to myself when I see this kind of post... as those middle school misses haven't learned the ways of the universe AT ALL.   The rules and laws of attraction and reaping what you sow ... say... when you wish BAD to others you are attracting it to yourself.  How ironic is that?   

My equipment  (my brain) doesn't want to deal with any more middle school misses... I didn't understand those behaviors in puberty and I don't want to try to understand them now.  What I am understanding more and more is my Grandmothers choice to "stay to herself" in her golden years..... I once thought it was because most of her friends didn't live as long as she did ...but maybe they didn't live as long because they were participating in this "secret society" that I am just learning about.   Maybe they were not protecting their equipment.  I intend on protecting mine.


Susan Moore said...

I really enjoyed this post, my friend. We've talked in great length about this lately.
I gained a lot of perspective in my own life by "leaving the drama and chronic whiners" by the wayside. One can only take it for so long. Guess I should clarify, I can only take it for so long and then I disengage from the situation. It takes a lot for me to make that kind of decision, but, for my own sanity and piece of mind, I've found this works for me.

justice said...

I thoroughly enjoyed this. Having evolved a bit regarding my fb etiquette, I truly know what you are talking about with this. That "on the outside looking in", with absolute horror, feeling. I see you Anjie!! Love and goodness!!

Anjie Kay said...

<3 thank you so much for reading and commenting , not all that will read this will undertand, but CLEARLY
you do ... thank you

BellaWonderland Kelli Hoosack said...

I will always help to protect your equipment. I love you. Be true to you, write it down and don't carry it around. So blessed to do life with you Fairy LaLa.

BellaWonderland Kelli Hoosack said...

I will always help to protect your equipment. Be true to you. Write it down, don't carry it around. So blessed to do life with you Fairy LaLa. I love you more than chochalate.

Anjie Kay said...

I love you so much and I am blessed myself , beyond words to have such great people in my circle.
Love you More Kelli H!!!