|photo credit: the sky is painted blue on facebook.com|
You see when I rearrange and redecorate myr life it almost necessitates the rearranging / redecorating my home, living space, wardrobe and maybe even my body or hair. I have also found that my transformation is freeing, yet very stressful at the same time. Have you read the book ........the happiness project ? I haven't read it all but I have read parts of it and part of it (I think chapter one) is about de-cluttering your living space, I have spent an entire year battling the forces that be on just that............ there have been a plethora of events that have forced clutter in my home from one room to another, I now have a junk room and the kitchen cabinets and a closet or two left A HUGE BOOKSHELF.........oh and the OUTSIDE SHEDS OMG........... to declutter, everything else is "just about there."
I have cut my hair, lost a little weight and am getting rid of things. Lots of things. I am using the rule of thumb......... "if I have not used it in a year, I probably wont".......... so get rid of it unless I can repurpose expediently or it has some type of hierarchy of symbolic importance to me or my children.
I thought I had a good hold on my paperwork clutter and had gotten the boxes of my grandmother and fathers paperwork down to a minimum..............well............ wrong I am now behind again. I wrote a will and everything (at least I have one, even though it is NOT correct and needs updating and add ons) I just have such a full brain that as I cross things off my list , I realize............ I didn't even have a complete list to cross off from.
When I was in training to be a social worker............ and was a practicing social worker.... I learned that the best cure for "addiction" of any kind is to change your environment. Change your "homies." Nope you cannot choose your family but you CAN choose your friend(s) and your mate(s) and where you live. When you change who you are around everyday , you change your life. It may be a good change it may be a bad change ......but it will change your life. I thought to myself........ "thats why you are a gypsy" .......... you have always wanted to change your life so you change your locale, you change your "core group" , you change your fabricated made up family because you don't want your life to stay the same. "to the gypsy that remains"........... take note!
I went to church over a month ago and there was a sermon by Pastor Hughes that touched me deeply it was all about "everyone is going to hurt you at some point in every relationship" this sermon coincides or resembles another "saying" that has stayed with me over the years, an explanation of how God planned for us to separate from our children. He made them all rebel, its inevitable, they will rebel, count on it and the extent of it will depend on your "shock and awe" meter. what ever it takes to make a parent(s) ready for their child to move out. If they don't change (rebel) then you would keep them with you forever. Its the plan............. everyone will hurt you and then there will be change. its up to you on how you recover from the hurt and how you change yourself not the other person.........and the best thing to do is mend the relationship and mend on, unless there is physical or mental harm that will come from it.
Remembering back over the years another person told me, in restaurant management training, that the people that have seniority, that have been here the longest will be the most problematic, "because people don't like change." Some of them will quit because they are so ingrained in what they do that "change to them means unfairness or bad, when its good for the whole." People don't like you to change the rules, once you start playing the game, but sometimes you have to change the rules to make the outcome better. I think the Marines even credit their "success" rate with the mantra "improvise-adapt-and-overcome." adapt is the operative (figuritively and literally) word............change change change.......
change is the key to happiness for me.......some may think that this equates to.....running away from my problems instead of fixing them.............. that is the farthest thing from the truth or my mind....... I know I take my problems with me , I am just changing the outcome ........ with lattitude / attitude ....... I have to give "the gypsy that remains" permission to change ........ big time........ as scarey as it may be i believe it to be necessary.
They say the definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome............ I definitively do not want to be in-sane......... so change......... yes spare change will come