Monday, June 6, 2011 prompt

about 1/2 inch in length

I pray.   I pray out loud when I am alone.  I never pray in front of people but I do tell people that I will pray for them.

I often forget to pray over my food and give thanks.........but I don't mind doing it when others feel uncomfortable not eating before this ritual.   I think God knows I am thankful for my food.......... if he knows anything about me at all , he knows i like to eat and eat well........ and a lot ...........its part of how I enjoy life. 

I pray a lot and often when things are not going "right" in my life.  A catastrophe hits and Imma praying....... making all kinds of "deals" with God.   When my husband appendix burst I promised anything and everything to just let my husband live.  I should have written it all down.  I am sure I have forgotten some of my promises. One promise I kept............ that I know I leveraged about was my smoking.  I did quit 3 years ago.  I didn't even remember this on the 21st of this month as an anniversary........ but its monumental.

I learned to pray about things and for things by osmosis.  I wasn't taught. I didn't have any role models, but I did have the church bus that came thru the "government subsidized apartments" where we lived and bribed us to ride the bus for a goldfish, candy and even money.  I was told this was bribery by those that were my elders, but I didn't care I went anyway to get the "incentive" be it candy or be it a goldfish or coins I learned early about "earning" perks.   I learned alot about what "not to do" as an adult in church.  A baptist church to be specific.

Once I wound up at Church as a preteen and I was an emotional and hormonal mess. I was crying about some drama that was going on in my life at home (I don't even remember the specifics of the crisis) and what I remember is an adult giving me two terms that I guess were supposed to be comforting? that I have not liked to hear in any capacity ........... "this too shall pass" and "when life gives you lemons make lemonade"
What a crying teenage girl wants is validation and solutions to things if she wants an opinion at all, not a pompous guy in a nice suit, off handedly giving you unsolicited words of wisdom.  NEWSFLASH.......   They want someone to "understand" their problem (can relate in some way) and / or ways to overcome it.............making lemonade shouldn't have been a topic unless they were offering me a sip because it  wasn't a viable solution for me unless I could sell enough of it to buy my way out of the "situations" I found myself in.   I think if this person would have taught me about the "power of prayer" instead I would have benefitted far more than what I did at the time from those words i didn't forget ......... along with
unanswered prayers. 

I have many.  Does that make prayers and the power they hold "less powerful?"  because many go unanswered? 

Why are some prayers answered and others not? would they be fixed without the prayer? hmmmmmmm

These are the things  I think about when I think about PRAYING........
Consider the PRAYING MANTIS........above ...........photographed above while this spider was quickly working with his own prayers......of the praying mantis falling or slipping down into his web.......

What Irony............

about 1 inch long

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